Sage is Good in Stew

What is it about lists that make list-writers smarter than the average bear?

Who cares, read EZimmerman's neighborly advice, from Austin to Houston over the white picket fence on a sunny afternoon while drinking a High Life and ignoring the half-mowed lawn...

1. Quit whining about the NEA. It’s a carrot on a stick, and four years ago they showed us the stick. The amount of gelt the NEA hands out is so paltry, its like pouring a martini over an iceberg.



2. Get the fuck out of school and start your grad work in life 101–its this really bitchin’ independent study deal where you get a job and support yourself while you also work hard at building a body of work.



3. Don’t hang your work in clubs. If bar owners think you are a genius let them buy some of it so they can bask in it full time.



4. Don’t have five shows a year in the same city.



5. Shut off MTV and read some books.



6. Xerox this one to your brain: any art-related job at the beginning is a good job; i.e. illustration, installation, etc.



7. Get paid. Intern, unless you are getting paid something is another word for chump.



8. Don’t harbor the illusion that artists are more important to the world than waiters, cops, sales people, and guys with squeegees.



9. There is a word for a person who hands you his/her slides at someone else’s opening, and that word is “asshole.”



10. Don’t resent your friends when the catch a break, its catty.



11. Get good slides.



12. Check the attitude at the door; really, no shit, i don’t care if you’re some over-looked fountain of brilliance.



13. Don’t let a bad review fuck you up. At the outset of your career you’re like a rookie pitcher, the first couple of years critics are going to light your ass up just for snicks. Besides, they write for each other anyway, and remember, opinions are like assholes: everybody’s got one and the other guy’s sticks.



14. Don’t marry another artist; one of you will wind up sticking your head in the oven.



15. Work hard. Everyone who has ever made it in the racket has worked hard, whether you like them or not.

list written by Tony Fitzpatrick, whoever that is- thanks!